This period of Corona has been that of revelation to all of us. We have had all sorts of individual, collective moments of epiphany. We realize our wrongdoings, the problems that our current system of being is and we are also focusing on solutions (I hope we are). I am not going to deal with the collective consciousness that has developed within us but rather I will focus on the personal journey here.
It all began with the Lockdown. Schools were closed. All public spaces got closed. Initially, it looked like it was a vacation. Everyone (those who had the privilege) started looking for means to keep oneself motivated during the day. So some picked up cooking as a hobby(well this one was more of an imposed hobby), some picked up painting, sketching, some started taking online courses and so on. Everything literally went online. Classes also began happening online.
While the classes were going on, it gave all of us a motivation to look forward to the week. I say "all of us" because I heard one of my students express the same. It was exactly how teachers and students felt. Right now it is Summer Break for me. It usually is a time where I look forward to my time. The time that can be used for things that I like doing.
Honestly, this was my ideal situation. The one where I was on my own, reading, writing, singing, listening to music, after all creating moments, stories, memories... But when the ideal becomes a reality, does it remain equally fascinating? I am getting my answers these days.
What I have realized about myself is that there is an initial state of panic or let me say anxiety when the ideal or the abstract notion that lays in the head comes face to face. But later on, when I would have endured this anxiety and overcome it, I become calmer and it is easier to carry on.
The reality is for us to manage. It is our attitude towards it that determines what course it will take. However, this may sound easy . It isn't. Because the mind has its own way of working. At one instance I feel differently about a situation, on the other, my feelings makes a 180 degrees shift. What am I suppose to do then?
Coming back to the subject, this is my vacation time. Initially, I had decided to take a flight back home to be with my parents. My flight got cancelled and then I changed my mind. I think I am doing well. But on certain moments, I doubt the decision. But then, I start thinking about how I comfortable I am here in my place right now. The only thing missing , that I sometimes feel is the missing company. But then these moments pass. And I get back to normal. (Well what is normal !)
I am just blabbering it seems. I have been maintaining journals these days. (It isn't new for me )
So there is a gratitude journal ( one day, I didn't know what was I grateful for) , there is this daily journal where I write what all was done during the day, then there is one for setting the tone of the day..
So here I am on a Sunday morning, I got this idea, that I will register whatever I feel on my blog..
Let's see if I can pursue this challenge.
So today I felt a bit motivated. I did Surya Namaskar and some basic exercises (which I havent been doing), I had lemon tea, had breakfast, chatted with a friend, then with family ( oh it felt so good, we were having a discussion on the current state of affairs , oh how I miss my childhood where my parents would come to our room to wake us up on a Sunday morning but would sit and we would chat ...what good times we had during those days.... Omg, I miss those days... )
I have realized "Stream of consciousness" is my narrative technique.. :)
This is what my vacation is like !!!
It all began with the Lockdown. Schools were closed. All public spaces got closed. Initially, it looked like it was a vacation. Everyone (those who had the privilege) started looking for means to keep oneself motivated during the day. So some picked up cooking as a hobby(well this one was more of an imposed hobby), some picked up painting, sketching, some started taking online courses and so on. Everything literally went online. Classes also began happening online.
While the classes were going on, it gave all of us a motivation to look forward to the week. I say "all of us" because I heard one of my students express the same. It was exactly how teachers and students felt. Right now it is Summer Break for me. It usually is a time where I look forward to my time. The time that can be used for things that I like doing.
Honestly, this was my ideal situation. The one where I was on my own, reading, writing, singing, listening to music, after all creating moments, stories, memories... But when the ideal becomes a reality, does it remain equally fascinating? I am getting my answers these days.
What I have realized about myself is that there is an initial state of panic or let me say anxiety when the ideal or the abstract notion that lays in the head comes face to face. But later on, when I would have endured this anxiety and overcome it, I become calmer and it is easier to carry on.
The reality is for us to manage. It is our attitude towards it that determines what course it will take. However, this may sound easy . It isn't. Because the mind has its own way of working. At one instance I feel differently about a situation, on the other, my feelings makes a 180 degrees shift. What am I suppose to do then?
Coming back to the subject, this is my vacation time. Initially, I had decided to take a flight back home to be with my parents. My flight got cancelled and then I changed my mind. I think I am doing well. But on certain moments, I doubt the decision. But then, I start thinking about how I comfortable I am here in my place right now. The only thing missing , that I sometimes feel is the missing company. But then these moments pass. And I get back to normal. (Well what is normal !)
I am just blabbering it seems. I have been maintaining journals these days. (It isn't new for me )
So there is a gratitude journal ( one day, I didn't know what was I grateful for) , there is this daily journal where I write what all was done during the day, then there is one for setting the tone of the day..
So here I am on a Sunday morning, I got this idea, that I will register whatever I feel on my blog..
Let's see if I can pursue this challenge.
So today I felt a bit motivated. I did Surya Namaskar and some basic exercises (which I havent been doing), I had lemon tea, had breakfast, chatted with a friend, then with family ( oh it felt so good, we were having a discussion on the current state of affairs , oh how I miss my childhood where my parents would come to our room to wake us up on a Sunday morning but would sit and we would chat ...what good times we had during those days.... Omg, I miss those days... )
I have realized "Stream of consciousness" is my narrative technique.. :)
This is what my vacation is like !!!
